It's too loud around here.

It's interesting that as long as I've known God, I still choose to turn to other sources for answers.  I know He is the God of all wisdom and the One who makes the plans, but I turn to every other source for some sort of confirmation or indication that what God is saying is true.  Is that what He intended?  I think not. 

Now, don't get me wrong- it's not bad to seek godly counsel.  That's Biblical.  What's bad is when I seek godly counsel before I seek God.  Or, if I seek God and hear Him saying one thing while the rest of the world is screaming another.  Funny how the world tends to drown out that gentle and quiet whisper. 

The truth is, we know the truth.  Deep down, we have the Holy Spirit who is burning to guide and counsel us.  But, we allow our own thoughts and the thoughts of others to drown out the quiet counsel of our souls.  And, then we complain that we can't hear God.

Maybe it's just me.  Or maybe you're in the same boat.  But, what would happen if we didn't open our mouths to others until we got a clear perspective from God?  I think- and this is just my humble opinion- we would save ourselves a lot of confusion and a lot of time.  How much easier is it to listen to the an omniscient God than a few of your friends whose thoughts are not nearly as high as His?

I'm reading Elisabeth Elliot's book, Passion and Purity, and it has been convicting on a number of levels.  Just when I think I have "been crucified with Christ," I find myself running back to old habits and dependencies.

Everything we experience must first be given to God. A praise? To God. A trial? To God. A worry? To God.  A fear? To God.  Not to anyone else but Him first.  Why do I get this so mixed up?

"Waiting silently is the hardest thing of all...but the things that we feel most deeply we ought to learn to be silent about, at least until we have talked them over with God." Elisabeth Elliot

Jehovah Jireh

To say that I'm grateful or thankful or overwhelmed or blow away by everyone's support doesn't even convey how I'm feeling right now.  Words can't describe how unbelievably blessed I'm feeling by all the prayers and financial support.  God is working in ways I never thought possible.  Oh, me of little faith!

As of now, 1/3 of my trip is paid for!  I received a call from Mr. Keith Thursday night saying that the youth group (at First Baptist Church of Lake Placid) is committed to raising $2,000 in support.  I didn't quite know what to say besides, "Are you serious?" and "That's so awesome!!" Goofy grin on my face for the rest of the day : )

Wanna hear another cool story of God's provision?  I had an appointment at 12:30 with the Passport Agency in Miami today.  My passport has to be expedited in order to allow time to apply for my visa.  After the one hour drive to downtown Miami and 10 minute drive around the parking garage (8th level parking- success lol), I arrived 15 minutes early for my appointment.  I went inside to check in, thinking this would take an hour at the most.  I was wrong.  There was an entire room, well, more like two rooms, filled with people who all had appointments and were waiting.  (Just wondering Passport Agency...why make appointments when they don't really matter?) 

Anyways, I went up to the window to check in.  "Can I see your passport application, primary form of identification, secondary form of identification, two passport photos, and travel itinerary?"  Whoa- talk about information overload.  I began pulling documents out of my folder and handed them to the receptionist.  Then, I opened my purse to get my driver's license only to discover I left it in the copier from the night before (they require copies of all this stuff, too!).  Smart one, Chelsea.  I was horrified.  I think my face lost its color.  I had just wrestled lunch hour traffic and checked for everything before I left, except for my license, of course!  She said, "Since you have your previous passport, you might be able to use this as photo I.D., but it might not work because it is a minor passport.  You will just have to wait and see who you get.  The wait is two hours"  My head starts spinning.  Roommate gone on trip to NY.  Other friends can't get into room without key.  No time to drive back and forth because they shut the office doors at three and appointments can't be held.  I decided to wait it out. 

Immediately, I began praying- "God, I trust that You have everything under control and You work all things together for the good of those who are called according to your purpose.  You do have a purpose for me at Patmos.  Thank You for being the God who provides.  Where does my help come from?  My help comes from the Lord, maker of heaven and earth.  Whom then shall I fear?"  Right after that, I texted my prayer warriors for some serious interceding!  If I didn't get the passport today, it would throw off my chance of getting the visa in time for the trip, which meant no Patmos this summer!

The two hour wait turned into two and a half.  By the end of my time in that hard plastic chair, I had decided the government should invest in a cheerier paint color for their Passport Agency office.  The gray was killing any hint of happy, especially with the security officers.  Finally...NUMBER 126!!!!  My heart kind of raced before I got to the window.  I was walking and praying, walking and praying.  I handed over my packet of documents and photos.  She asked to see my Driver's License (of course), and I explained what I had done.  "Well, do you have your social security card?" No 'mam.  That's at my house in Lake Placid.  "Where is Lake Placid?" lol...yeah I get that a lot.  Needless to say, she ended up using a birth certificate and my minor passport and the copy of my driver's license ("I can make this work," she said).  5 minutes later, I was out of that drab gray office, smiling like a kid in a candy shop.  Misison accomplished- God, You rock!

It was just one more opportunity for God to prove that He doesn't need little 'ole me to work out the details. Thank goodness, because I would fail miserably!  Jehovah Jireh..."The Lord will provide." (Genesis 22:14).  His provision isn't conditional upon my actions.  He provides because He loves and because He can.  I have a feeling that the Passport Agency won't be my only Jehovah Jireh on this adventure. 

Calling All Prayer Warriors!

Okay!  I was supposed to post this yesterday, but time escaped.  There is just so much to do before I leave.  I've definitely been praying that God will multiply my hours and streamline all these processes : )  I appreciate so much all of your prayers as I prepare for this adventure.  I cannot say this enough!

Many of you have offered to pray throughout my term in Brazil, which makes me excited, for "The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." (James 5:16)  When we pray, God moves...and I can't wait to see how He will!  I need at least thirty prayer warriors to commit one day of the week to pray for a specific need.  For example, John offers to pray for "surrender" on Mondays.

There are a few needs I feel God has laid on my heart, but if He is leading you to pray in another way, feel free.  Here's what I have so far:

• Surrender
• Endurance
• Safety
• Peace

As new needs come to mind, I'll let you know.  In the meantime, leave a comment or email me (with the need and the day) at cseignious@hotmail.com if you want to join me in prayer.  I'm going to make an email list before I leave so that I can keep you all updated while I'm gone.  This is the most important kind of support for my trip- I really believe that! 

Here I Go. Patmos 2010.

The moment I was anticipating since Wednesday finally came.  Each time a new piece of email came to my phone, I immediately checked to see if it was a response from my Patmos interview.  This morning- the moment finally came.

"Congratulations!  You have been accepted into the Summer 2010 3-month term of Patmos: Reality Discipleship in Campo Mourao, Brazil."  It went on to remind me that PATMOS BRAZIL STARTS IN 27 DAYS!!!  AHHHHHH!

Part of me leaps with excitement, and the other part shrinks back with nervousness and anxiety about what is to come.  I know that I will leave as one person and come back as someone completely different.  To tell you that I am completely at ease would be a lie.  I will be leaving my friends and family for three months with people I don't know in a country I've never visited.  But one thing is for sure:  "The Lord works all things together for the good of those who love Him," and He has plans "to prosper, not to harm."

In Patmos terms, I will be "challenged for the purpose of change." I will be pushed beyond my own human limitations to discover what it really means to depend fully upon the saving grace of God.  I will be stretched and poured out.  I will decrease so that He will increase.  And I will learn what it means to "be crucified with Christ."

All for the glory of God.  My life is not my own.  Just like the video I posted yesterday said, "It's not what you can get from God, but what God can get from you."  This summer, I'm laying it all down to see what God can do with me. 

But, I can't do it alone.  I need all the support I can get.  Starting today, please partner with me in prayer as I prepare to tithe this season of my life.  Pray that passport and visa documentation will go through without any issues.  Pray that God begins to break down barriers in my heart that keep me anxious.  Pray for peace in the midst of this chaotic preparation (26 days!).  Pray that all the doctor's visits, paperwork, and plane arrangements pan out the way they're supposed to.

Pray that God provides over $6,000 financially that I will need for this experience.  I am confident in Christ that He will accomplish above and beyond what we can ask, think, or imagine.  In my mind, $6,000 is a lot of money that I don't have, but hello- I serve the King of the Universe!  I think He can manage a measly $6,000.  I'm counting the financial aspect as just one more challenge in trusting God.  Oh, and did I mention that He holds time in His hands?  Beginning and the end?  I'm thinking He's more than capable.   It's just about me being calm and resting in His perfect peace in the process.

I will keep you all updated as things progress.  In the meantime, pray, pray, pray and please share this link with anyone interested in supporting me.

If you want, you can leave a comment letting me know what you're praying for.  Two weeks before I leave, I have to turn in a prayer support sheet, listing people committed to praying for me on a specific day of the week for a very specific need.  I'll post about that tomorrow once I have time to set up a sheet.

For more info about Patmos, check out http://www.realitydiscipleship.org/ : )

Let the crazy adventure begin!

All That I Am

I read Psalm 103 this year on Good Friday, and it has become one of my absolute favorites! Lately, I've been reading Bible verses out loud instead of to myself, and you would not believe the difference it has made.  It's almost like I'm proclaiming it to myself- as if hearing it actually spoken makes it more real than simply reading it.  At first, I felt a little awkward.  With this Psalm, I just kept reading it over and over though.  It captures a heart that is full of gratefulness for what God has done.  It reminds me of forgiveness and love and patience and compassion- and weakness.  Yes, the last one is not a typo.

The more and more I get into God's Word, the more I realize just how weak I am and how much I need Him.  It seems to be a reoccurring theme in my life.  I talked about this in one of my posts a few weeks ago.  I had been striving to meet the "standards," to be "good enough" for God.  What a relief it has been to embrace His unconditional love once again!  It is so refreshing and rejuvinating once you realize that God doesn't love you any more or any less if you spend ten minutes in prayer or thirty.  That's why I love Psalm 103.  Praise, praise, praise.  Who else can love like He loves?

Verse 14 has been on my mind since Good Friday, and it has dramatically changed my thinking.  "For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust."  After reading that Psalm, you're probably thinking....okay, that wouldn't have been my pick, but let me explain.

I'M DUST!  I'm a big lump of dust!  God knows that.  Sometimes I try to puff myself up and act like I'm more than that.  I'M DUST!  I'm weak, and on my own, absolutely worthless.  I'm just a shell here on earth.  But, but....when Christ lives in me.  Wow.  Now that is something worth looking at.  When Christ lives in me and in You, people notice.  He disciplines me and corrects me and changes me, but "he remembers we are only dust."  When I fall short of God's glory, He isn't suprised.  He knows that I will.  What matters is the motivation of my heart.  Is my whole heart seeking after God?

I used to think that in order to seek fully after God, you had to be a devoted Christian who studied the Bible six hours a day and evangelized at least two (okay, maybe these numbers weren't always the same, but you get the idea).  The amazing thing about Christ is that He is everywhere- in the car, in my class, at the office.  God doesn't speak to me just from the Bible, and He doesn't use me to speak to others only when I set aside two hours.  Day in and day out, He purposes each and every move. 

Have you ever stopped to think about that?  I was walking home from the gym tonight, and I thought to myself....God knew exactly what time I would go to the gym tonight.  He knew how long I would run, when I would get tired, and when I would begin gasping for air (haha- just kidding). The crazy thing is He actually knew that not only for me, but for each and every person around me.  And He knew that I would be sitting here, on April 16, writing about Him.  And He knew that you would be reading this right now.  Crazy, isn't it?

Okay- back to the seeking fully after God idea (sorry for my tinge of ADD kicking in ; ).  I used to think in order to seek fully after God, you had to be chained to a desk praying and reading the Bible.  After your hours of study and prayer, you could then go boldly proclaim to others the Good News.  Only people in full time ministry can really serve God, or that's what I thought.  Well, God's been using me in ways I never thought possible.  Whether it's conversations at work, or with people in line at Chick N' Grill.  Every movement He purposes for a reason.  And the great thing about it all is that when your heart and mind are fully focused on Christ, you can be doing whatever it is you need to be doing and still glorify Him.  There's always what Tozer calls that "secret communion," that goes on between you and God.  If you love someone, they're always on your mind.  You can't wait to spend time with them and share with them what's been going on in your life, and you look forward to hearing about their life.

I now approach prayer not as a burden, but as a delight.  When I miss my morning time alone with God, I normally say, "Man, God, I missed you this morning.  Sorry about that."  I look forward to telling Him my deepest longings, my heart's desires, and my dreams.  Even more so, I love to hear Him.  I absolutely love hearing God's voice.  He never disappoints, never discourages.  His voice is always full of love and compassion.  So back to Psalm 103.  I can't say it enough.  "Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise His holy name.  Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me."

My Somewhat Embarrassing Post ; )

It's true.  God's promise is true- if you seek me with all your heart, you will find Me.  I've found Him and I love Him so much more each day.

I'm so thankful that God cares enough to correct me and to show me the right way to live.  It's the only way I'll ever be fulfilled- He's the only One who can make me truly happy.  I've seen the evidence in my life, and it's amazing!

Now, anyone who's known me for a while probably has a good understanding that it's impossible for me to swallow pills.  Everytime I get a headache, it's straight to the BC powder for me, baby!  If I have a cold, liquid DayQuil and NyQuil are my best buds.  Well, lately I've been getting headaches, but my BC Powder doesn't seem to work anymore : (  On a whim, I thought, you know what?!  I'm going to try those extra strength Tylenol I got in a first aid kit for college.  You're probably laughing hysterically right now at how dramatic I'm making this seem, but this is a big deal for me-lol.  So, I got the Tylenol out and I prayed that God would help me and heal me.  Guess what slid right down?  Pill #1.  Pill #2 I had some trouble with, but as soon as I focused on Christ again, that medicine had no chance!  It just goes to show that God does care about every little detail in our lives.  Is there something you're struggling with trusting God today?  Just as He has proven Himself faithful over and over in the small things, He's ready for us to move onto "big girl pills."  The harder it is for us, the more room He has to work, and the more praise we get to give. 

A few hours after my "big girl medicine" experience, I just kept thinking how great the God is that we serve.  He deserves so much more than I usually offer.  May our actions reflect our love for Him today.

Battling It Out

Well, friends, it's been a while since my last post.  Sorry about that.  As the semester goes on, things just continue to get busier and busier, but that's no excuse!  Hope you find yourselves wrapped tighter and tighter in God's arms as you continue throughout your days.

So, what have I been learning lately?  God's really been speaking to me about the power of prayer.  It's a lost art, if I might say so.  The most incredible tool for Christians, and we rely on it almost as a backup instead of a natural instinct to fight our battles (or at least I do).  I've been reading stories about Christians who made radical decisions to commit themselves to prayer, constantly.  It's incredible to read of how life-changing that decision was and to also to see the effects of such a decision.  If God's people commit themselves to prayer, He will move like never before.  But, we have to take it seriously.  It reminds me of a verse that I learned at Student Leadership University a while back.  Dr. Richard Land spoke and reminded us, "if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." (2 Chronicles 7:14).  Sometimes I believe we give up.  We look around at what is happening and think that the world is beyond hope, but it isn't.  Letting the world wear us down and discourage us is a plot of the devil.  No one is beyond hope and no dream is too big if you're dreaming God's dreams.  He wants us to believe impossible things.  He wants to accomplish impossible things in and through us.

Speaking of impossible things, has anyone seen the new Alice in Wonderland film?  My friend, Stacy, came down from Georgia this weekend and we made a trip to the IMAX to see the movie.  I was thinking- okay, this will be a fun movie.  Lots of play and imagination.  While there was a certain element of that, it was a little more serious than I thought.  Alice found herself in a land of death and destruction, yet it was written in a Sacred Scroll that she would be the one who would slay the enemy and redeem Wonderland.  Her days had been planned, and she was prepared for her battle beginning at an early age.  I love how God just shows up everywhere when you're seeking after Him.  I could not get this out of my head.  When Alice is crying and trying to figure out how she will do the impossible- how she will slay an enormous creature that has the potential to crush her with one step- she is reminded that if she holds onto the sword (it was a special sword, but I don't remember the name of it : ), the sword will know what to do.  I know, I know- you're thinking that sounds kind of silly and maybe it does.  But, it reminded me of our sword as Christians.  The sword of the Spirit.  In a constant battle between good and evil, in a destructive land that has no promise for future, we are called to be the warriors who fight on Christ's behalf to heal the land.  We've got to cling to His word.  If we follow it, we will do exactly what He wants.  We may get confused and upset and wonder if we were really created to do whatever challenges we're facing, but if we remember to hang onto our Sword, we have no reason to be afraid.

"Sometimes I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast."  At the climax of the film, Alice is battling the Jabberwocky and gets knocked down a few times.  Each time she gets back up, and she reminds herself of the impossible things that have already happened thus far.  Take a look and remember where God brought you from.  When I look, even over the past couple months, I am amazed at how much God has transformed my heart and my mind to be more like His.  Then, I think- that's impossible.  I could have never accomplished that on my own- only He can.  And it gives you hope.  It gives you hope that you can trust His word and battle your trials with that Sword.  Soon, Christians will become victorious by standing firm on these promises.  We will defeat the enemy if we dare the dream impossible things and rely on Jesus to do what only He can do. 

P.S. Go see the movie if you haven't!  As a visual person, I highly recommend it.  Maybe it will give you a new perspective on the battle, like it did for me.  And, if not, it's just silly to look around and see everyone in those humongous 3-D glasses- lol.